Last time we talked about acknowledging, appreciating and rewarding ourselves as a way to speed up habit change. Catching ourselves doing the right thing, and high fiving ourselves. The brain LOVES that.
This week I want to talk about the opposite, because a common metahabit is NOT to reward ourselves. NOT to celebrate. Rather, to shrug off successes (it was nothing!), compliments (oh, this old thing!) and all manner of spotlights shining on us and any achievement, large or small.
(Haha just kidding! NO achievement is truly small. Not on this planet, girl.)
Anyway, if we don’t acknowledge, appreciate and reward, it’s like moving the goalpost. It’s sending our brain the clear message: Not done yet. Not there yet. Miles to go before the reward.
Aka "NOT GOOD ENOUGH."
Listen, I don't know if there's any message MORE DESTRUCTIVE AND MORE PERVASIVE than "not good enough." What would make you give up faster?
And really, wouldn't you be smart to do so? If nothing's good enough anyway, seriously, why bother?
We all of us already have heard that message of "not good enough" many times. Even well-meaning people give us that message once in a while.
Evil-meaning people let us know we're not good enough all the time: the beauty industry, the diet industry, misogynists, racists and 99% of people selling something.
So DON’T PILE ON. (That's Rule No. 1!) Don’t do their work for them. Don’t make shit worse. Don’t give yourself a reason to give up when you’re trying to make a change.
Change is hard enough. We have to make it as easy as we can. <- Feel free to tattoo this where you'll see it.
We can’t make it harder. So no moving the goalpost. When you’re there, you’re there.High fives!
Stop bingeing and overeating. Immediately.
Download your free cheat sheet now.